Welcome to Yoby Henthorn

Tonight I'd like to post some poems from Yoby Henthorn's volume When Icarus Falls, a work in progress about the poet's bipolar disorder.  These poems are the first published from the series.

Anhedonia is a term meaning "a psychological condition characterized by inability to experience pleasure in normally pleasurable acts" (Merriam-Webster Dictionary).

Anhedonia

I stare at the leggy, late summer geranium

 blooms bob in midair

Grass as green  

As In late summer rain is grey.

I don’t wish for fall

For bright gold birches

Against

Skinny, black spruce

I wish for the Browns, grays against

 Thin blacks

Of spruce

Before the first snow

Makes them beautiful.

I don’t wish for soft, deep snow

Falling down,

Muffling sound

I wish for a bench

In a stubbled hay field

Sharp, whistling wind

Blowing snow grit sideways

Scouring my face

As it blows clean

The fields

From Kansas to New Mexico

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Persephone’s House

My house is piles, mazes, dust , and string

Heavy grease of fried fish, thin chicken blood, and stale water

Pool, bead and glisten on the kitchen surfaces

My house smells

Like nickel,

Like copper,

Like pig- iron,

 Like salt.

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Missing Diana

She’s hunting tornados.

Books , magazines and craft kits

 Avalanche off the table.

We kick them out of our way.

She didn’t buy groceries before she left.

She hasn’t bought groceries in months,

But has left a large, half- finished Victorian gingerbread house, with its half-finished furniture.

Hulking on the kitchen counter surrounded by bowls of royal icing hardened to ceramic.

When we are bored , we flick pastel candy shingles off the roof

When hungry, we break off a piece of wall and run it under water so we don’t break our teeth.

We toss the dog a chair, or a sofa.

Yarn from unfinished afghans snakes around our feet.

We shuffle slowly to some corner, chair leg, lamp base,

Placing the yarn carefully

Firmly,

Tightly,

Weaving a web.

Tornadoes will end come winter.

She will come home.

We’ll snare her.

Make her tell stories for a thousand and one nights

About the nine billion names of God.

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Diana

Heat waves shimmer from the asphalt road too soon after a cold cloud of depression lifts.

This is what I live for.

Thunderstorms building up, up up.

Lightning storms sizzling my brain.

Hail

Softball size

Yes!

Falling, cracking, breaking, breaking

Silence

Green Sky

Spinning sick

Nosferatu’s fingers reaching down, down, down

I bite the wrist and ride.

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Cerberus

The chow’s fur

Millions of thin beading needles

He brushes  against me,

Never leaves my side.

Thousands of needles

I pull out every day

And place in a bronze bowl on my nightstand.

He corals me into the bedroom

Corals me onto my bed, yet won’t let me sleep.

As soon as I doze, he growls and jumps on me,

Lies upon me

The needles pierce me no matter how many blankets I use.

I sit up again and pull the needles

Out of me

Out of the blankets,

Out of my shoes.

Small dry plinks as I drop them into the bowl.

He will let me go to the toilet,

But not the shower,

Not anyplace he can’t be with me.

He’s allergic to water.

I wet a towel corner anyway

Wipe my face, my underarms, my groin

Knowing I still smell sour

He’s brushed against the towel

So I let it drop

Knowing it smells sour anyway

Knowing it is too full of needles

Knowing I can splash myself with water

And splash him at the same time

Every once in awhile, he lets me eat,

But only because he is hungry too.

A piece of cheese for me, a piece for him

A tablespoon of peanut  butter for me

A tablespoon for him

My face is as thin as a knife.

My teeth rattle in my gums

His shoulder blades and hips poke through his fur.

He is losing thousands of needles a day.

I wonder which of us will die first.

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Ben Williams' "Things Don't Exist" is a good song to start with: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4XHVHS8uDJU

Here is his "Lost and Found" with Christian Scott: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmG2oPaHpwk

"Black Villain Music" fits well, too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJmu2i0-TUo

I'll finish with his version of "Moontrane": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gq_rpYcAVpw